3 - Got A Lot To Talk About
by shiix
Summary: A Brittana ficlet from a RP, third segment: With Santana's foul mood escalating as a result of being bullied out of college, Brittany is stuck in the firing range. With one small brain lapse, the lives of the girls change as they walk away from everything they made together. (brittany-loves-sanny.tumblr & santanalopezxoxox.tumblr)


**_Santana had been on the couch for most of the day since Rachel and Finn had gone out. Her anger was at a boiling over load as she wondered where Brittany was. Her girlfriend hadn't been home in awhile, and Santana was worried. Of course she was a bit mad too since Brittany hadn't left her a note or anything to let her know where she was. She let out a groan as she tried to sit up without agitating her broken ribs. She hadn't been sleeping at all in fact she tried her best not to toss and turn at nights. She heard footsteps coming into the lounge and she saw Brittany walking toward her. Santana crossed her arms across her chest and continued watching the t.v._**

**_She could feel Brittany watching her and Santana did her best to not turn around to look at the pout that she knew Brittany was wearing. Her hands were turned into fists as her anger was still rising. She let out a huff and squinted her eyes." Have fun?" Santana asked Brittany bitterly as she sat there still watching the t.v." Find any guys to flirt with? I suppose you would though wouldn't you? You're utterly gorgeous and guys are always taking advantage of you." Santana said with a scoff and an eye roll still not looking at the blonde beside her._**

BxS

Brittany walked into the lounge with her arms crossed over her chest. She knew Santana was angry. Even if there was no reason, it was a decent guess considering the way Santana was behaving recently. The blonde felt as though she was treading on egg shells, and not in an interesting romantic way. She heard her girlfriend huff and ask if she's had fun.  
"Umm, San? I went to go see my aunt, I left you a note inside your pillowcase," Brittany murmured quietly, looking down at the floor, "I guess you didn't find it." It really hurt her that Santana wouldn't look at her, especially because they hadn't seen each other all day. All Brittany wanted to do was get her cuddle on, but she knew not to wish things that wouldn't happen. Ever since they arrived in New York together, Santana's mood had been getting gradually worse, leaving Brittany helpless.

Santana's next accusation shocked Brittany enough to look up at her girlfriend.  
"Of course i didn't," She began before adding in a very quite voice filled with what would only be described as pain, "I love you."  
The dancer knew better than to react to what was next to leave the Latina's mouth. Sure, she always knew Santana was a jealous type but she knew her girlfriend was sure that Brittany truly loved her and wouldn't even look anywhere else. She had spent countless weeks proving herself and now it all seemed to go to waste. Brittany finally spoke up after an uncomfortable minuet of silence, in a very weak voice.  
"You know me better than that, baby…"

BxS

**_Santana finally looked at Brittany still with the frown upon her face before rolling her eyes." Really, Britt? You put it in my pillow case?" Santana said before she got up off the couch and began to pace in front of her girlfriend." How on earth was I meant to find it when you put it in my pillow case?!" Santana basically screamed at her before shaking her head." I mean, I must be a pretty genius person if I knew you would put it there!" Santana kept going, letting her out her anger as she continued to pace. Her ribs were demanding her to stop but Santana wasn't finished." My girlfriend disappears on me and leaves a note in my pillow case. How freaking awesome! I basically slept with a fucking note!" Santana said with no one in particular._**

**_Santana scoffed at Brittany's words, her head was swimming and she felt like she was just going to collapse right then." Yeah, didn't stop you from dating Artie though, did it?" Santana asked her as she continued her pacing." You loved me then didn't you? And you still dated him, brushed me off as though I was nothing!" Santana said, she knew this was a low blow, they had moved on from it, but Santana just couldn't stop herself. She rubbed her temples as she continued to pace, doing her best to keep her head firmly in the now, rather than going to another place, and completely forgetting this whole thing._**

**_Santana looked at Brittany, her pacing stopping as her whole body was heaving from the workout she basically just did." Do I? If I knew you better than that I would know where you would put the note!" Santana shouted before throwing up her hands dramatically. She closed her eyes, and did her best to calm down, her head was getting all mumbled and she was starting to forget what they were even talking about. Shaking her head she frowned at Brittany before shaking her head." We were meant to go exploring together, but you just…." Santana trailed off and shook her head again before turning around and facing the t.v." I am so angry!" Santana shouted before sitting on the coffee table._**

BxS

Brittany stepped backwards slightly, away from her pacing girlfriend. She was speaking too fast for the blonde to comprehend in her head and every time she opened her mouth to reply, the Latina attacked her again.  
"I'm sorry," started Brittany in a low voice, avoiding eye contact with Santana, "I thought it'd be like the Princess and the Pea. You're my princess and you should've felt it and it was supposed to keep you awake until you took it out.. I… I've read it recently to be smarter at school to graduate and it was the only book easy enough to understand.."

The blonde took yet another step back when her girlfriend began to shout. It was something she had seen Santana do a hell of a lot over the years, but it was never until very recently when it had been directed at her.  
Brittany felt her eyes starting to sting with the tears threatening to spill. She lowered her head further to cause her hair to cover her face. She couldn't let Santana know she was so close to tears.  
"I'm sorry.. I really am.." She said softly, her voice starting to crack before adding for the second time, "I love you."

BxS

**_Santana stood there staring at her girlfriend before shaking her head." Well it didn't work, Brittany. Instead I stayed awake worried sick about you! But of course none of that matters does it?!" Santana said before shaking her head once more speaking in Spanish for a bit as she wiped some of the sweat off her face._**

**_She could hear Brittany talking in the background but it sounded so distant, it was like she wasn't even there. Santana felt herself losing her ability to stay in the now, she could feel herself forgetting. Her anger risen once more as she fought for control." SHUT UP!" Santana screamed, before she could hear the quietness." I can't take this anymore!" Santana continued to scream not even looking at Brittany as she shook her head more and more." Just, shut up." Santana said in a more calming manner._**

BxS

In any other situation, Brittany would have found it adorable that Santana stayed up all night waiting for her to come back into her arms. However, the tone in Santana's voice of that of an accusation.  
"Sorry.." the blonde whispered, wrapping her slender arms around herself for emotional support. She just wished she could go to the doctor to make it all better. Santana had always been her 'lady doctor' who fixed things when Brittany was a sad panda. This was a big change, which was something the dancer was not good at.

Brittany flinched as Santana screamed at her, as though she had been slapped. The tears that had threatened to make an appearance jumped from her eyes and raced down her cheeks. Brittany began to bite her lip hard to suppress the sobs that were building up within her chest, so hard that she was frightened she would make it bleed.  
As she looked up to meet Santana's eyes, she felt her heart literally break within her rib cage.  
"I love you.." Brittany addressed the Latina, her voice now thick with sadness.

BxS

**_Santana's anger was overwhelming, the heat that had risen in her body had made her feel utterly sick. She was sweating a lot and her breathing was rather raspy, it was probably something to do with the screaming she had been doing, but Santana was feeling sicker by the minute. She knew she was fighting with someone, but she couldn't remember who they were. She couldn't even recognize them. They were just a blot that was sitting or standing in front of her. _**

**_She tried squinting her eyes to see them, but she couldn't even see them still. Cursing she rubbed her eyes, and her temples before opening them again at someone telling her they loved her. That voice, she could pinpoint that voice anywhere, but the anger came back once more. She walked over to Brittany and shoved her into the wall." I SAID SHUT UP!" Santana screamed before she turned away. She quickly turned around and faced Brittany a complete shocked look appeared on her face." Britt….." Santana couldn't finish her sentence, she just pushed Brittany into a wall forcefully too. _**

BxS

Brittany had never been more confused as she watched her girlfriend but her eyes after she told Santana she loved her. There was a sudden flash of movement as Brittany saw Santana march towards her. Brittany smiled, thinking Santana was about to embrace her and dropped her arms from their permanant spot around her chest.  
All of a sudden, Brittany felt herself flying backwards as Santana shoved her will full force. Taking her by surprise, the otherwise nimble dancer fell backwards, causing her to fall to the ground. The blonde heard the crack of her head hitting the wall before she felt the collision. Almost immediately, Brittany felt a gush of warmth flooding from her nose, signifying a nose bleed brought on my the trauma.

In too much shock to register the pain she should have been feeling, Brittany looked up helplessly from her position on the floor to Santana, who had turned around to face her, apparently equal in shock.

BxS

**_Santana watched as Brittany's nose began to bleed. Santana just stood there in shock before the guilt started to wash over her. She hurt her, she hurt her Brittany and made her bleed. She started to walk toward the dancer before she froze in mid walk." I…I am so so so sorry, baby." Santana stuttered as she stared down at her. She wanted to take her in her arms cradle her let her know that everything was going to be okay, but she was the one that hurt her. She might as well have called her stupid or something. _**

**_Santana sat down on her legs in front of Brittany, guilt, pain and fear were in the Latina's eyes as she stared at her girlfriend." Brittany, please, say something." Santana said as she started to fiddle with her hands. She needed to make sure Brittany was okay. She couldn't believe she had pushed Brittany, she couldn't believe she had hurt her. An ache in her heart had formed as she realized how bad this could end. She could lose Brittany because of this, hell she wouldn't blame Brittany. She just sat there staring at her girlfriend, hoping the girl was okay._**

BxS

Brittany felt as though she was stuck in a bubble. She could see Santana's mouth moving but the words washed away before they reached her ears. Slowly, the blonde brought her hand to her face. Pulling it away, she looked down at the red liquid that stained her hand and began to shake.  
Lifting her head, she looked up at Santana: the girl she once loved with everything she was. Brittany had never been hit ever, no matter how mean or stupid she had been in the past. She couldn't understand why her lover who worked so hard to get her would, just because she said she loved her.

Tears began to freely roll down Brittany's pale blood splattered face. She tried to talk but her mouth just open and closed helplessly. The spasm of shakes her body was subject to left her helpless and unable to move. She watched as Santana knelt in front of her. Brittany suddenly flinched away from the Latina and dropped eye contact, letting out a terrified yelp.  
For the first time in her life, she was frightened of Santana. The very girl who loved her and protected her all through high school.

BxS

**_Santana had never thought in a million years that she would hurt Brittany. She had fought so hard to make sure no one hurt her, yet here she was, yelling at the girl and then making her bleed. She watched as Brittany just sat there before looking at the blood on her finger._**

**_Santana watched as Brittany started to cry, and all she wanted to do was hold her, let her know that she was so sorry that she didn't mean it, that she would take it all back if she could. That she loved her with every fiber in her being that nothing could change that. That she would protect Brittany no matter what happened._**

**_She watched as Brittany flinched away from her, scared of her. Santana's heart shattered into a million pieces when she watched the blonde become scared of her. Her eyes started to tear up and the tears rolled down her tanned cheeks as she sat there defeated because Brittany had every right to be scared of Santana, she had every right to flinch away from her like she had done just then. Santana looked down at her hands shamelessly while she let her tears fall freely from her eyes. She didn't know if she should speak, ask what Brittany wanted. She had a feeling what Brittany wanted, she could read the girl like a book, just like Brittany could read the Latina like a book too. She looked up at Brittany, brown pools of sadness meeting blue pools of hurt, and terrified. Santana mouthed a "I'm sorry" before getting up from where she was and walking into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and throwing it against the wall, before slumping down to the floor, biting her lip to not let a scream escape from the pain and hurt she was feeling. She placed her head on her knees, her arms wrapping around her legs as she just cried. _**

**_She walked back out to the living room, seeing Brittany still in the same place. She stood in front of her, a few spaces away, not wanting to crowd her." You can have the room." Santana told her as she looked down at her with a shameful look on her face." I am so sorry, baby. I am so sorry, I never wanted to hurt you, I never wanted that to happen, I love you, Brittany, I would never intentionally hurt you." Santana said as she stood there staring at Brittany, broken and guilty._**

BxS

When Santana began to cry, Brittany had no energy to respond. She wanted more than anything to tell her everything was okay and they were fine, but she knew that wasn't true. Everything was broken and they were finished.  
Brittany heard a glass smash in the kitchen, causing her to further flinch. After all the time she had known the Latina, not once did she think what it would be like to be in her firing line. Soon after, she began to hear sobs that matched her own.

She wasn't sure how long they remained that way, but she found Santana back looking at her like an exhibition.  
"No.. no Santana," Brittany began, her voice straining, "I don't want to stay in your room.." Without looking up, she knew her words cut Santana up. She needed to get out and fast. She knew that if she stayed in Santana's room she would crawl back to her: needing Santana to hold her.  
Hearing the Latina express her love, Brittany couldn't reply. Like everything else in her life, this was now yet another thing she was now unsure of.

BxS

**_Hearing Brittany's words, made Santana realize that, that was it. She had ruined the only good thing she had going for her. She had let her anger take over on a woman that she had loved with all her heart. She broke them, and she knew she would never fix them. She had terrified Brittany, scared her so much that she flinched when she went near her. She shook her head as she did her best to keep the tears at bay. She had no right to cry for she had done this to herself. She looked down at Brittany and just nodded her head before looking at her room." Right. I understand." Santana said in a defeated tone. _**

**_She walked to the liquor cabinet and took out a bottle of alcohol, she wasn't even sure of what it was, but she didn't care, she took the cap off of it and took a big gulp, before looking back at Brittany. She made her way to her room, sure that Brittany wouldn't want to see her anymore." Make sure someone goes with you to Lima, okay? I don't want anything bad to happen to you, Brittany." Santana said sadly, before walking into her room bottle in hand and closed the door. That night, Santana was going to drink herself to sleep, and wake up tomorrow and do the same thing. She broke herself, she hurt Brittany and caused the girl and herself pain that she never wanted to experience. She had no reason to go on anymore, no reason to fight to get her life back on track, because there was no one to fight for, no one to come home to, to tell her day too. She ruined that because she refused to get better. Santana no longer cared, about anything, she lost the one person she cared about, and for that, Santana was going to punish herself more than what she deserved._**

BxS

Brittany sighed as Santana left to go to her room. She just brought her knees to her chest and cried. Deep down, she knew that dating Santana was too perfect. This Santana was not her Santana. She had lost her.  
Now she was lost. Without Santana, she had no one. The blonde didn't even know how to get home, let alone clean herself up. She was shattered.

Timidly, Brittany got to her feet after a few stumbles. She needed someone to go to that could make it better. Her thoughts drifted towards Rachel who was probably asleep in the apartment. With her blood stained skin and tearful eyes, she tiptoed to her room, careful not to alert Santana.  
The blonde knew she needed to get out of New York and back home as soon as morning arrived. She couldn't bear to see Santana again, as much as she wanted to. Brittany would be stupid to do that, and she knew she wasn't. No matter what everyone said behind her back.

She had loved the Latina with all her heart, but all good things seem to come to an end.


End file.
